So Saturday night my sister-in-law and I went out with a few friends for a "girls night out." We went to PF Changs for dinner (love it) and then a movie. Steph (my S-I-L) and I weren't sure if we were gonna go to the movie but were excited about dinner, especially Steph who has 2 kids and doesn't get much girl time! :)
We get to the restaurant and not surprising there was a 90 min wait! So Stephanie goes and gets me and herself a couple of drinks and we proceed to wait our time to get in. This whole time I am fine talking, drinking my cosmos whatever. Our little bell thing goes off, we get up go to the front desk then they take us to our table which of course is WAY in the back of the restaurant...lucky me.
So we sit down and for whatever reason I could not catch my breath. I don't know if it was the cosmos (I just had a couple its not like I was wasted) or the hike to the table but I was not feeling good. So I ordered a coke and everyone else ordered there appetizers and when they came to the table I couldn't even eat anything because all I could think about was not being able to catch my breath. So my SIL looks at me and says "are you ok, do you want me to go get your oxygen?" and of course I was like "no, I will be ok."
Well after all the appetizers were done and our food was about to come out and my SIL asking me like a MILLION times if I wanted my O2 ...even saying that if anybody looked at me funny or said anything she would throw her plate at them (which made me smile) I finally agreed to let her go get it because I was completely miserable and wanted so badly to enjoy my seared tuna (my favorite) so she did. I automatically started feeling better and I was able to be apart of the conversation and even though I felt like everyone must have been looking at me I don't really think they were. PF Changs is super dark inside so that kinda helped. ;)
I was super upset at the fact that this was the FIRST time I have ever used my O2 in a public place but in the end I was glad I did because I was able to have a good time and feel ok doing it. I might need a transplant but that doesn't mean I have to be couped up in my house from the rest of the world until that happens!!
Sunday, January 11, 2009
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4 comments:
WOMAN, you absolutely shouldn't coup yourself up in a room waiting for your transplant. But, you can't live your life caring what other people think. You will never see them again, and so what if they think "look at the young girl with the O2, I wonder what's wrong with her?" I have honestly wondered what wrong with old people when I see them pulling a tank. You could have had a mucus plug or something it doesn't mean you are ALWAYS going to need your O's.
The point of this all is this, your health is what's important. So what if you need to have your O2, in the meantime, you were sitting there miserable until you got the support you needed.
As for the starer's get a t shirt like that drug commercial. This is your brain, this is your brain on drugs.
Yours can say, this is a person with CF, this is a person with CF on Oxygen, Any questions? And on the back it can say, NOW STOP STARING.
Hey Jen! I'm so proud of you for putting on the O2! I KNOW it's not easy, esp. the first time out in public with it.. Believe me, I should write down ALL of the crazy things people have said to me while I was wearing it!! BUT it's SO worth it to go to a meal, a movie, ride the motorcycle, .. whatever and FEEL good while doing it! I know, in the end, I didn't want to miss out on life, just because I was embarrassed about wearing O2!... and it got easier each time I did it... One last thing.. when people gave me that "oh, poor thing" look, I remember thinking, what annoyed me the most about their stares was, I really hoped they didn't feel sorry for me b/c I actually do have a VERY blessed life, and what a judgment to make just b/c a person is wearing supplemental oxygen... We have wonderful husbands and supportive family and friends, I wonder if people would think twice about judging or feeling sorry if they knew how blessed we actually are! Love and hugs!!! Keep wearing that O2 if ya need it, it makes your body and heart not have to work so hard, which will help you out after tx also!! :) Whoa, that was my looongest comment EVER!
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